All posts filed under: My story

Is all this healing work worth it?

Recently, on my way to herb school, I remembered a class from last year where a fellow student had helped me work on the chronic pain in my shoulder.  “Hmm, I haven’t really had that issue in months.” I thought to myself. “I wonder what else has improved in the past year or so. ” I, like many people, have an ongoing list of health issues that I struggle with. Currently it is my slow digestion that I am most focused on. It occupies a lot of my time and thought, to tweak my diet and herbs, massage my belly, focus on letting go of what I no longer need with ease … As I’m working with these little daily changes I get impatient and sometimes it’s hard to see the big picture.  I get frustrated with how slowly things change. Is all this healing work worth it? Sound familiar? But really, are they that slow to change? Here’s my health inventory. As I said, my neck and shoulders are no longer in chronic pain. …

Some things I really like

Walking in the sun is one of my favorite activities. As is thinking about things to write. Today I’ll write about some things I like. I like the way the new Tulip Poplar leaves glow in the sunshine against the stark blue sky. And the dark squiggly lines the branches make among them. I like the bright yellow dandelions that have taken over the neighborhood. I like the large, brown and grey striped caterpillar that I saw sunning himself on the stem of a weed, perhaps it was wild lettuce. I’m still working to identify that one. I like the feeling of pebbles and stones, grass and warm cement under my feet as I walk. I like the satisfying ache in my muscles that reminds me of last night’s late night of Contact Improv Dancing. I like my little heater behind my back that takes the chill off as I type in my little room. I like being able to write and publish my thoughts to the world. Ahh. So many nice things in life. …

What is the point?

I pause in the road watching the mist roll across the pavement. The sun is warming the water left behind by a freak March snow flurry. I consider taking a picture of the mist. But it is so fleeting and good results unlikely with my limited camera skills. Besides, just standing there and watching the beauty unfurl and curl and sweep away is completely satisfying. This is what I am fed by. Moments of art created by the hands of nature. Nothing to do but enjoy it. After a bit I notice I am contemplating my own nature. Clearly I could bask in the beauty for a very long time. But I don’t, I move on, am moved on by the question/ demand almost : “What is the point here? What is is for? How does this serve, contribute, inspire another?” The urging pushes me into action. Or perhaps I should say “terrorizes me”. I am a creature of our productive results oriented culture. Everything is supposed to be for something. Even a fleeting vision …

Business card, Irridescence Reiki, Energy Healing, Herbal Medicine

Business Cards

  I’m totally excited. I just got my new business cards in the mail. These were ordered on a whim late at night after I was inspired in the shower to just make something really simple. Here they are I am pleased. Who says it has to be painful to create a business card? Here are my previous cards from 2002 and 1999 each of which took many hours of design and cost way more than the $17 I spent at Vistaprint last week. And the new ones are even 100% recycled.      

Making Stuff

I seem to be obsessed with making stuff, or at least the idea of it. Beef stock Saurkraut Kefir Beeswax candles Knit seat cushions Intarsia gloves Salad dressing (just made some with my daughter yesterday, Yum. duelling flavors) Fermented Ketchup Kombucha not to mention the pile of half processed herbs and about a dozen new blog post ideas All these are running around my mind and whenever I have a minute I come up with more.Whoa! What is going on? I so don’t have time to make all of this. And where are all these ideas coming from?I’ll credit the 4 planets in Pisces, Realm of Possibility, where my Sun and Mercury live. My imagination is currently highly stimulated. Well, it’s weekend now so we’ll see where I get too. Maybe my hands in the dirt or a brisk walk outside would be good too. To clear my mind and ground my inspirations. ******************** Checking in a few months later. I have finished my fingerless gloves, and they are lovely.     It pleases me …

Protecting the Light

When the light shines fully in a physical being when I am filled with divine goodness and love, especially as a a woman, I am in danger in this world, or so it seems. I walk down a bike path near the woods in a shady neighborhood. Ahead of me there is a small group of men standing. They are smoking and looking off into the woods. Occasionally they turn my way looking somewhat sheepish, like boys who have just done something they shouldn’t have or are about to. Maybe they are drinking, maybe they are just the type who look guilty. I don’t see anything particularly suspicious, and still fear rises up in me. If I go off to sit in the woods to meditate, will I be safe? Men will come to women, to take something, to release something, to find something that they feel they do not have in themselves. And women are raped, beaten, dominated, controlled, put down and used to compensate for a feeling of lack, unmet need, inadequacy. There …

Talking with God

When I was 13 my world kind of fell apart. At least as far as I could tell. I read about the holocaust. I visited a concentration camp in school. People killing each other in the most brutal ways, just a generation before me, because they were different and they were scared. I read about the looming danger of nuclear war. People might just destroy everything. My parents were getting divorced. We moved to the US with my mom. I lost all my friends over night. Up until this point I had talked with God. I don’t know when we started our conversation, but I remember spending my evenings in conversation with a sweet, gracious being who was the creator of the world. As my sense of the world was undermined, my faith in God started to crumble. No one around me noticed, they were all too busy with their own troubles. I stopped believing. I stopped talking to God. Why would I talk to someone who let so many horrible things happen in this …